Widowed

John & JoMae 8/29/1959

~ Widowed ~

Grief is a huge transition

the loss of all familiar patterns

in one’s life - the universe has shifted

you feel oddly out of place without your love

for half of you is missing, one shoe has fallen off

Grief is also metamorphosis

a long slow patient process while

the butterfly is forming - while seeds of

life are sprouting preparing buds to flower

watch  notice  trust - new life will form in you

Trust the seed within a tragedy

buried in unexpected change that

devastates  and lays you low - please

know this, deep sparks will quietly emerge

first unseen, their glow will one day blossom in

New Life

JoMae

11/18/19

Sharing what I’ve learned so far as I consider the next leg of this journey. Soon it will be three years since John died. I am so thankful for the blessing these quiet solitary days (at first so strange and unbearable) have become.  Somehow, since that awful day, my lifelong haphazard hobby of journaling began to pour out in a new rhythm. I find great comfort and joy in the writing. Waking each day eager to know what will come.

Then, if it feels right to me, I post with a prayer that perhaps my words will bring courage to someone. ‘Casting bread upon the waters,’ as a friend said long ago of her own work.  

So here are the words that came knocking this morning - distracting me from what I was reading, demanding to be written down.  Enjoy!