Time

A Matter of TIME

San Francisco Parrots
Photographer: Scott Runcorn

~ Our Hours - My Minutes ~

For years, all fledglings flown

we traversed each day at a

leisurely pace armed with

quiet plans and purpose

our lives were full, framed around

each other’s schedules and long

conversations, we danced the

hours within a harmony we

largely took for granted

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Suddenly our hours were only mine

when conversation stopped and

time measured in minute steps

each minute endless silence

an empty void devoid of harmony

purpose gone - no plan in sight

save to find a way, look deep

into past lessons learned to

survive this new reality

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Time does help to heal

present time, future time

most especially, past time

which holds strength to build on

courage learned before - life long

lessons stored for such a time as this

JoMae

5/18/21

Shadows Dancing

~ Shadows Dancing ~ 

sometimes it’s hard to know

where the real you starts

and the shadows end 

in life’s reflection

of the dance

JoMae

3/3/21

Grace

Replanted

~ Replanted ~

In the valley, in the shadow

sheltered from the storm

my lines have fallen in

a pleasant place for

one to grow and

blossom once

again

Thanks be to Godde

-JoMae

                    2/6/21

Echo of Psalm 18:1-19

Echoing the Psalms - 

Sometimes when I read a psalm, I hear it as a prayer and adapt it just enough to be my own - building on the scaffold of the ancient language. So most of these words are straight from the NIV, yet personalized for today's voice in echo of David’s. Enjoy!

~ Love Song of Psalm 18 ~

echoed by JoMae

My Godde is my rock, in whom I take refuge,

my shield, the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

I called to my Redeemer, who is worthy of praise,

and I have been saved from deep distress.

The cords of death entangled me

the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me

the cords of the grave coiled around me

the snares of death confronted me

In my distress I called to my Redeemer;

I cried out to my Godde for help.

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I love you, O Jehovah, my strength

you are my rock, my fortress, my deliverer

please accept my prayer of thanksgiving

even before I was able to ask, O Godde,

from your eternal throne you heard my voice

my cry came before you, into your ears

I knew of your covenant

had long lived in your love

remembering your faithfulness

trusting your grace, I found peace

your Presence held me through

death’s upheaval and the turmoil of grief

to prevent my falling into the pit of despair

your presence in the chaos saved my life

<><><><><>

while the earth trembled and quaked

the foundations of the mountains shook

they trembled as when you are angry

smoke rose from your nostrils

consuming fire from your mouth

burning coals blazed forth

parting the heavens

you descended, dark clouds under foot,

then mounted the cherubim and flew

soaring on the wings of the wind

you made darkness your covering

your canopy around you --

the dark rain clouds of the sky

out of the brightness of your

Presence, clouds advanced with 

hailstones --  and bolts of lightning

You O Godde, thundered from heaven

your Most High Voice resounding, you

shot your arrows, scattering the enemy --

with great bolts of lightning you routed them

the valleys of the sea were exposed, the

foundations of the earth laid bare at

 your sovereign rebuke - at the blast

of breath from your nostrils

you reached down from on high 

took hold of me and drew

me out of deep waters

you rescued me from my powerful enemy

from loss, too strong - confronting me 

in the day of my disaster, but you

O Godde were my support

you brought me out into a spacious place

rescued me because you delight in me

because of your great love for me

with a heart full of praise and gratitude,

~ Thank You ~

JoMae

12/3/20

David’s graphic description of Godde’s fierce anger battling on our behalf, echoes well the chaos felt after the trauma of sudden loss of one’s beloved - and the confused disorientation that ensues. Yet through the chaos, we are rescued. Saved because of our Redeemer's abundant love for us. Amazing Grace!

Empathy

Photo by Elizabeth Spoelhof

~ A Touch of Empathy ~

Lee stepped into the break room with a smile on her face. In part the mask she wore in public, partly real. The room was empty of any other workers, so making a coffee, she relaxed to savor the silence in a busy day. Deep in thought, she was surprised to look up and see Jim, from sporting goods, walk up. She’d met him and his wife at the last get together. A really pleasant couple.  What she didn’t know was that before meeting Mel, Jim had lost his first wife to cancer. He knew the pain first hand.

Having heard about the recent death of her husband, Jim sat with his coke and told her how sorry he was. That he knew how hard returning to the realm of work could be. How disorienting the world must seem as she made her way - now on her own. He spoke as one who had been there and told her that he had. They talked.

The relief of speaking with one who had lived her grief and understood what she was dealing with, poured through Lee.  She didn’t cry, but as they shared this moment, she recognized the unique gift of this man’s kindness. That something special was happening. When break was over and he stood to leave, placing a hand gently on her arm in a heartfelt wish for strength and comfort, encouraging that time would heal for her as it had for him, she knew the moment would live on.

And it has. Joy in life takes many forms. Not long after this encounter, Jim was transferred to another city. Their paths never crossed again. But the empathy of that caring moment does live on. It marks a spark of possibility, of new beginnings bursting from the ashes.  A pivot. New potential delivered through the gift of caring. A gift offered by one person who did not shy away from the awkwardness of reaching out. Did not succumb to the silence born of not knowing what to say. 

For Lee it was a touchstone of the love she long had known. A rekindling of hope that happiness would someday return. A glimpse that the sadness of loss would not reign forever. An affirmation in her heart that life was not over, more gifts would surprise her and she could begin to trust and expect them to appear. 

Now several years on, she still recalls that day when in a moment raw with grief, somebody understood. At a time when it seemed impossible to look forward to anything, when life was just going through the motions, when anticipation seemed a lost art, one man’s empathy touched her core and became a small step in turning life around.  In time sadness did begin to fade, enthusiasm for life slowly returned and the art of anticipation blossomed once again.

JoMae

11/13/20

Hermit at Heart

Determined to Blossom

~ Hermit at Heart ~

I think I’m learning to ‘calm the beast’

to hold the reigns of thought that 

rattled me at first - confused

and sent me spinning to

discover the  new me

find my hermit self

quiet my raging

heart, saunter

safely home

at peace

riding

joy

JoMae

3/27/20

Change - Exchange

~ Change - Exchange ~

in each moment of change some familiar is lost

sometimes our choice, yet more often not

as we adjust to each fall let us recall

that embedded in change, exchange abides

deeply tucked into loss, a gain resides

a hidden seed prepared to sprout

like a spark in the ashes ready to glow

may we know, be aware, prepare, take heart

find hope against that day of unsought change

be open - with time - to watch for, welcome and

unwrap the surprise present offered in

The Gift Exchange

JoMae

11/14/19

As If...

~ It was as if… ~

Godde split me open

took home my other half

then pulled me kicking and

screaming into a blessed 

new chapter of my life

Thanks be to Godde

JoMae

3/23/20

Encouragement Personified

Artist: NancySpoelhof.com

~ Friends ~

There is no frigate like the mind to

bring friends near when far away

to gather close when tempests

toss and life's a lonely dream

I often board it’s memory to recollect

the people clustered there in vibrant
conversation, recalling vividly, lost 

moments of camaraderie, of joy

Encouragements in various forms

mingle on this ark, sending short

texts or emails to those treading

unfamiliar waves all on their own

Mailed cards, warm caring  

moments -all sweetly savored,

phone calls, patient listeners, so

healing for one floundering alone

Around my floating frigate drift gentle

words, sad smiles, soft hugs, the touch

of a kind handshake, empathetic fingers

resting lightly on the arm in conversations

Encouragement Personified

JoMae

5/16/20

Collage Artist: Nancy Spoelhof

Those left alone after death, often find ourselves in the tension between adjusting to - even learning to enjoy - aspects of our new life chapter - and times when days feel empty and it seems ‘everyone’ has disappeared.  Of course, ‘everyone’ has not abandoned us, but the void left by the one who is gone can make it seem so. 

I wrote this piece while pondering these things, as something to remember when quiet is too quiet and spring is long in coming. Recall the good received and endeavor to go and do likewise.

Prompt: Psalm 42 Echo

Photo by Bonnie Kittle @bonniekdesign

~ BE STILL ~

As a deer looks for flowing streams

so my soul reaches out to you, O Godde

cries out to behold the face of living Godde

my soul turns to you, my ever present help

yet surrounded, held by your love as in a womb

I’m apt to miss the flow ready to quench my thirst

- prone to let the noise of my loud panicked cries

drown out the object of my search: your touch

your quiet answer breathing in my heart

the piercing of my blind spots

shading your ever present

flood of love from view

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When shall I come to know your breath again

dear Godde? Your familiar presence holding me?

As a fawn resting by the stream, I know, and

am reminded; I’ve been swimming in your

living waters all along. Safely held

Here I will live and breath and

listen for your Wisdom with

hope and a thanksgiving

stirring in my heart

Thanks be to Godde

JoMae

6/16/19

The Psalmist goes on to speak of sorrow, fear, wounds and feeling downcast -  forgotten by God, then recalls and repeats:  “Hope in God; for I shall again praise…”  That hope is reinforced by remembering moments when God was not distant. When God’s face had been more clear.  

Sympathy cards often wish the recipient many happy memories to comfort you.  At some point I realized that warm memories of the past not only sooth and comfort, but can also become the underpinnings for future joy. After loss, life is largely ‘before’ and ‘after’.  Memories, and all one has learned from them - from the past - provide the building blocks for what lies ahead. Each chapter of our lives is built on or against the one before. Life goes on. In deep mourning, one might not even want it to go on. Yet it does. 

At first we stand disoriented with one foot in the past, one unwillingly pulled ahead. Finally, when we reluctantly accept that the old chapter is closed and the new is inevitable, we do well to put both feet into it. Start building with every tool and memory we’ve known before.  Let each joy and sorrow be a teaching block. Turn any hobby and small skill into a gift to share in making a new friend, in finding a new purpose for this next chapter.  

May we allow past memories to serve as a firm anchor for life ahead, let them be a gift of hope as we create new joy and find the strength to build bright futures, Godde helping us.  -JoMae 

Today's Prompt: My echo of  Psalm 42 

Prompt: Psalm 63 Echo

~ Praise from the Shadows ~

Beloved Godde, you are my anchor

I hold on to you, rely on you, trust you

I turn to you for balance when thrown off

when thirsty, empty for answers, you

hold me steady and provide what I

need to survive on weary days

You are my sanctuary, the rock
to whom I cling.  Your love
sustains as life cannot

In the shadow of your wings
nestled in parental care

I’ll rest and sing my praise

JoMae

6/13/20

Today's prompt: my echo of Psalm 63