A Widow's Battle

~~~A Widow’s Battle~~~

Healing from the hidden wounds of loss,  I may 

look the same, behave the way I always have

yet inside I am broken knocked off center 

stunned and out of balance. Unfamiliar 

with who I am without my other half

No longer whole,   I am spinning 

physically,emotionally,socially

what once came naturally 

now seems unfamiliar 

Even with my ‘I’m doing really well’

mask/smile in place, I’m rattled 

even with my familiar friends

I’ve lost the art of casual 

 conversation and feel

 a miss fit socially

The missing pieces of my life

have left a shocking hole

that may not show, yet 

leaves me feeling 

self conscious

stressed out

unsettled

Healing, yet forever

analyzing what is going on 

searching how to understand and 

discover how to let my soul and body 

mend, how to rebuild a self that can be 

whole again - how to fill the gaps 

John left behind with new input 

of my own - new, yet ever 

tempered by the glad 

cells we formed 

together.

JoMae

9/2/17